help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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