Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
