I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i love accidental penises.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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