How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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