Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
