you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
