I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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