Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
