All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Holy sore nipples Batman
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
