you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
