That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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