WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
