why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
