It's Friday. Sex?
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
