He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
