Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
zippers are such a cool invention
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I can't put those talents on a resume
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
