just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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