Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Who wears a wallet chain?!
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Randomize