Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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