Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Randomize
