Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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