its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
