Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I lost the right to judge tonight
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
