I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
