okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
