White coat. Heels.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize