u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
