I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
