U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I just found a bag of teeth...
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
