there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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