Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rumble strips road head = magical
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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