Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
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