tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I understand Curling. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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