Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Houston, we have a blender
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
