Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize