It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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