i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize