We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
