Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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