i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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