i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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