Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
