You're so nebulous sometimes
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I am full of burrito and curiosity
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize
