If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
