ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
