So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Randomize
