I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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