my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
