Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Randomize
