It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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