AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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